piccadilly kim

(originally from september 23, 2006)

I've decided to start a system of classifying musicals. It's multi-tiered vertically and horizontally, so it might be difficult to explain here completely, but I'm dedicated, folks, so I'm going to give it a go. Ahem.On the tippity top come THE musicals. The undeniables. The of-course-these-are-phenomenal. They include Phantom, Cats, Lion King and, with reluctance I cave into academic peer pressure and include Les Mis. There's a few others I think might be able to hide away here (say, Beauty and the Beast, Joseph and the Amazing You-Know-the-Rest or The Hunchback of Notre Dame), but I haven't enough evidence to know for sure yet (which is a nice way of saying I haven't seen them in the West End ... and for you folks keeping tabs, I haven't seen Cats here either because it's closed, which rather undermines my capability to see it here, but I know it fits here. Trust me.)

I can't quite articulate what makes a musical one of THE. It's a combination of popularity, long-runningness and a whole lot of splash. It's that splash bit that's so enigmatic -- because I think it requires a large cast, tons of flashy costumes, lots of technical glitz and something either non-human or mythical, generally speaking. Plus a very healthy portion of stage magic, which is in some ways subjective, but in some ways so undeniable it's objective. If you've read this far, you're probably the sort who knows what I mean. Right?

The next level down brings the really good classics. These are superb and incredible and I have nothing bad to say about them, but they just lack a certain spark and sizzle. I think it has to do with them being entirely human, though if you can follow my mental meanderings here, feel free to help me pinpoint that thought more precisely. Anyway, this level includes Mary Poppins, My Fair Lady, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Music Man, Oliver, The Sound of Music and The King and I.On a level horizontally across from the last come the (relatively) new musicals that are fantastic, but still new and thus not yet long-running sensations. They include The Producers, Footloose, Chicago, Wicked and possibly others along the lines of Evita, Billy Elliot, Follies and Company. Their queen? Mamma Mia. Grease also seems to fit here, though I know it's been around the block before. It's because this category also encompasses those musicals that made their name as movies.Jumping down in a diagonal leap, we find the good ol' classics that are good, but not super-great. Guys and Dolls and Anything Goes spring to mind. A horizontal shift might (I'm still debating this) include classic novels brought to the stage but failed box office-ally. I created this category for Woman in White.

Moving down yet another tier, the ol' classics that aren't particularly good but still have some standing because they're ol' emerge. Showboat, Carrousel, South Pacific, Damn Yankees and Once Upon a Mattress are good candidates. I haven't seen any of them. I have seen 42nd Street, though, and am pretty sure it belongs here, too. Somehow I feel that Thoroughly Modern Millie is on a horizontal plane with 42nd, but again I can't be quite sure of that.

The final level is reserved for the don't-waste-your-money shows of no or undeserved fame. I'd put Dancing in the Streets and We Will Rock You around here.Actually, I guess there must be one sub-final level, the drafty basement of shows. (Suddenly this musing has expanded to include straight theatre as well, if only as a necessary means of incorporating the drafty basement.) Shows found here are offensive morally, artistically, intellectually or all of the above. The Holy Terror leaps immediately to mind, as does Edward II and, from everything I've heard, Midnight's Children. I didn't fancy Stones in His Pockets at all, but I know of many reputable thespians who raved about it (hence, I went to see it), so I shall not even mention it here.

As a final note, the caliber of shows within each level may vary, and there's a possibility that a show found near the top of one level may surpass a show near the bottom of the level above it. Also, of course, each individual production of a show varies tremendously from any other production, and different directors, choreographers, set designers, etc. may drastically alter the overall grade of the show. Please note as well that, for the purposes of this very subjective list, a high, West End/Broadway caliber of shows was assumed as a point of reference for all musicals considered.

Encore, anyone?